Happy Mom Monday to all my beautiful friends! I wanted to talk about a topic that I feel is important for all mamas and that is giving yourself grace in this social media world we live in. Social media is one of the most amazing tools. Social media allows us to keep in touch with friends and family that we do not get to see and witness the beautiful moments that they share with us. As amazing as this is, there is also a huge downside to this as well. Social media is a highlight reel of people’s lives. They get to choose what they want people to see and what they do not want people to see. Of course, most people will only share the happy moments (we are all guilty of this) and not the hard, sad, trying ones. While life is full of many happy moments, there are many hard points of people’s lives as well. So, that leaves us with today’s topic on how to love yourself as a mama and to know that you are good enough no matter what you see or who you compare yourself to online to.
Social media is full of mom and family blogs. Occasionally, I stumble across an Instagram account that shows a mama who is so real and raw, and I just have to say thank you to all those mamas because it is very refreshing and relatable to be able to see people who are willing to share real life moments. I know how hard it can be to share personal events like that, but is always nice to feel like you are not alone in the hard times as well. Even though most people should know and understand that social media is very superficial to an extent, I feel like it is still so easy to play the comparison game with your life versus the next mama’s life. Here are some important things that I think mamas should cling to when they start comparing themselves to others:
- Remember as we previously mentioned most people are only going to share the happy moments in life. Not too many people are going to be willing to share the moments when they are crying, stressed, and trying their best to hold on. Try not to compare people’s happy moments they post in a tiny square box online to your moments. They have just as many bad days as you.
- Not every mom always looks on point. To be honest, I look like a hot mess most of the time and the only reason I wear makeup most days is because I have to go to work. I know Instagram is full of moms who have cute outfits on, perfect hair, makeup and nails done, but a lot of them get up and look that way because their job is looking good for social media posts- that is what they get paid for. Try not to compare yourself to women like that. While they are very amazing, beautiful women, that is not the reality of motherhood. Most mornings, you are lucky to brush your hair and get half way decent because your kids come first. If I do ever get glammed up when I am off, I either have to wake up early or do it when my son goes down for a nap. Understand that you are beautiful to your children no matter what you are wearing or how much makeup you have on.
- Do not compare your situation to someone else’s. I get that it can be so easy to do. I have been guilty of doing it before. My son is 19 months old and one thing that I struggle with every single day since my maternity leave has ended is leaving him for work. I used to play the comparison game of not feeling like a good enough mother in comparison to my friends or people I see on social media because I do not get to take my son to classes daily to socialize or spend a ton of time with him because I am gone eight hours plus a day for work, the list could go on. I know how hard it can be to not compare yourself to other moms but know that you ARE ENOUGH, and you ARE DOING THE BEST YOU CAN!! Comparison is something that we are all guilty of in one way or another, but sometimes comparison can lead to jealousy and this is something that will ruin your life. Know that you are doing what is best for your family and that you can still be an amazing mama whether you go to work or not, whether you breast feed or formula feed, whether you make your own organic food or buy it at the store. YOU ARE ENOUGH!!
- Take a break from social media. I know that it is so hard to put the phones down. I get it. We live in a tech world and it is only going to keep getting worse as technology continues to grow. However, social media can become very addictive. While I know that I am on my phone for something every single day, I decided to start taking more time away from social media. As much as it is fun to share big parts of your life online, not every person should have front row access to every single part of your life. While I am continuing to grow in this area, I have learned that the time that I have with my family is special to me and as much as I love having photos and videos of my family, not everyone needs to see every part of that. Taking a break will not only help your mental health, but it will allow you to live your life and actually enjoy the moment you are living in!
- As much as I could go on and on with this topic, the last part that I wanted to share was to know that you are capable of anything you want to do. While being on social media, it is easy to see others lives and think I want that. Just know that every person must work hard to get where they are. While some people are handed things in life, most people are not. If you want to change something about your life, set a goal and start working hard towards it. You got it! There are a ton of mamas that are here to support you and I am one of them if you need someone!
I hope you guys enjoyed this post. I wanted to share something real and something personal that I am growing through instead of all the happy topics because life can sometimes just be hard and I want other mamas to know that you are not alone and that even though times can be hard, you got this! Just remember that there is not one path to life. We are all on different journeys that will lead us down different paths. There is no cookie cutter plan. So, try not to compare your path to others. If you have a mom Monday topic you would like to discuss with me, reach out to me on here in the comments or on one of my other social media accounts.
Xoxo, Bri
Ephesians 2:8 For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God.
Brianna Santoro 